fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
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