I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
the day after is always just damage control
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
