By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
