therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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