Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
