Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
tell me about the eggs
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