i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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