Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
