hell yes lets make some ravioli
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
