The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
