how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
