I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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