when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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