We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
