i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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