But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
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he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
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I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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