She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
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He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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