well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
