we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
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