quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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