those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
