I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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