i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize
