Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
