using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
