hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
