You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
