Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
