To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize