Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
