Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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