You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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