one might say we're banned from that church
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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