We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
