sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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