How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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