you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
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