Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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