I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
