Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
