I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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