For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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