just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
