They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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