If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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