So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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