true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
