You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
No subtext here. People are naked.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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