He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
