Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I look excited, but its just a facade.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
